A guy will go to the ends of the earth to get you. When he feels completely secure, he relaxes and stops making an effort. Men are way too concerned with the getting and not concerned enough with the keeping. The getting is the *easy* part.
There's always, always someone who would want the person you're with. That's why you treat them like sugar, so that every day they wake up and choose you all over again. It sounds scary and like hard work but it's more passionate and it means you always know they're with you cuz they want to be not because they don't want to be alone. The spark dies when someone in the relationship no longer feels that their efforts are valued. Not to be a massive man-hater but men in particular are guilty of playing women and taking them for granted then acting wounded when they leave. They don't even realise they're doing it until it's too late and as much as they want to be a victim they know they aren't really. If a woman plays a man he stays, desperate to win her over, but that's not how it works the other way around. It's important to retain self respect and that dwindles if you allow someone to treat you badly because you love them. But I don't know one girl who hasn't done it. I know a couple of guys who have too. Some women (and men lol) have a mad kamikazi desire for men who will hurt them, and some just don't. I always find the women I admire the most have the worst taste in men. I think it's because I look up to strong people and they need a strong partner to be their equal. Strong can be a bad thing. Not always though.
A girl will forgive a man she loves of almost anything but constant neglect. Often one terrible thing will be the last straw, if she's just holding on by her fingertips. But it's not the reason, it's the excuse, if that makes sense.
This can always be traced back to the Victorian issue of love versus jealousy. If you're completely secure in your faith in your partner you can't truly love them as the jealousy is missing and jealousy is supposedly the biggest part of passion in a relationship. This isn't according to me it's according to the French Victorian salons but I think they have a point. A boy will cross oceans to win someone but he won't even get off the couch if he's already got them. Louis the something only ever had one mistress for more than 5 years. He loved her more than his wife, more than anything. She never let him have her entirely to himself. He was always beside himself with jealousy so he never stopped desiring her.
I mean this whole thing is a little depressing; the moral is that a long-term monogamous relationship is bound to go awry unless you're either with a total saint or gay in which case you may be saved from the male find-and-fuck instinct, although some girls have it too so who knows eh? I know it's depressing but it's also just true. makes you not want to get out of bed in the morning because as much as you want to believe in love being this wonderful thing, it's based in the most destructive of other emotions.
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